Tag Archives: Ilead365

The accusation paradox in disagreement

An anonymous, reported by Ilead365 (http://www.ilead365.com) spends some words on interaction in disagreement. The author quotes an asiatic saying which states that “He who rides a tiger can never get off”

There are a lot of possible interactions that can happen when parties don’t find agreement.
One of the most dangerous is the one that determines a vicious circle of accusation and counter-accusation between the counteparts.
Is not so difficult to understand that if you get stuck in this situation, exiting is not so easy.

Also, on top of this situation, comes a personal feeling of not being able (or not willing) to step down from the situation.

This kind of pattern can only be solved and interrupted, if both parties (maybe at different times) acknowledge how their own behaviour is influencing that of the other.

This is not a “pure” stepping down the tiger, or loosing the position.
It’s only a way to make the first step towards an agreement.

Positive and negative: a judgement

An anonymous, reported by Ilead365 (http://www.ilead365.com) spends some words on the fact that being lucky or unlucky depends a lot on the point of view.

Either if something is going wrong could be that in a different time the situation turns as a good one.

The story that is always told for this (with variations on main character: sometimes is a native american, some other is an old man, in thsi case a farmer) is the one that follows. “Once upon a time there was a farmer, who found one morning that his cow had disappeared. He set off to look for her. First he went to his neighbour who shook his head and said: “what bad luck”. “Good or bad luck, who knows?” replied the farmer, and he went on his way. The next day the cow was back and a beautiful horse stood next to her in the meadow. The farmer told how the horse had walked home with his cow and the neighbour exclaimed: “well, what a bit of luck that is!” “Good or bad luck, who knows?” replied the farmer. The next day the farmer’s son rode on the horse but was thrown, and broke his leg. “What bad luck,” said the neighbour when he saw the son. “Good or bad luck, who knows?” replied the farmer and carried on with his work. The next day war broke out, but the boy couldn’t march. The neighbour called to the farmer that he’s probably been spared from a terrible disaster. Good luck or bad … and the farmer ploughed on.”

If something happening is positive or negative can be determined only after a while. Very often the amount of decisions and path we take either in a conscious or unconscious way, reminds me a “fractal shape”. Every time we take a decision, we influence our destiny. It’s a big weight to carry, but the good thing is that every decision taken is not right or wrong. It’s just a step in a long journey.

Coaching and leading

An anonymous, reported by Ilead365 (http://www.ilead365.com/) spends some words on how to deal with others, saying that “[…] To handle yourself, use your head; to handle others, use your heart”.

We covered lot of times the concepts over leadership and its recognition.
On a theoretical point of view I can quite agree on the fact that “the best leaders are the ones we are the least acquainted with, Less good are those who are celebrated and obeyed. Worse still those who are despised.”.
It’s true that a good leader is the one that relies over a self conscious and well determined group that feels as its own the achievements made.
But let’s be a little more cinical and say that on la leader point of view, he/she should be able to sell the group achievement at least on both sides: for the group but most of all for himself.
Because if group is valued is a great achievement, but if leader is not perceived as necessary…no career… 🙂

Fate and ability to interact with it

Ilead365 (http://www.ilead365.com/) reports Auschwitz survivor Viktor Frankl words on our capability to interact with fate, saying that “[…] You can take everything away from another human being, but for one thing: the possibility to choose his own way in which to react to a given situation”.

Most of the people think that bringing our own knowledge to others is the key of successfull coaching.

But is only a way of make us believable in front of others (You did it, so you’re experienced and I can trust you), because each one of us is likely to behave in very different ways at same situation.

Old latins said that everyone makes is own life (quisque artifex fortune suae).

It was true once upon a time, and I believe is still quite true. Now is a little more complex because of the globalized world we live in and the multiple interactions we have to take care.

Change management taken seriously

An anonymous, reported by Ilead365 (http://www.ilead365.com/) spends some words on difficulties of change management, saying that “[…] changing an organisation is more like navigating an oil tanker than sailing a yacht”.

Of course is another case where dimensions count ( 😀 lol!): is a different effort and challenge if you deal with a big organization or a small one.

In both cases, you need to handle change with all kind precautions you can, but strategies may be different and, in my experience, there’s no rule of thumb or “one size fits all” approach.

Change is more like handcrafting than mass production.

Changing a big organisation can be compared to turning a  big ship or truck in small space. It takes some factors that cannot be ignored: view and experience, target, patience, time.

View and experience: you cannot go though a change without knowing which are the dimensions of the road you’re taking. This goes through a deep analysis of working impacts for each involved target (that should be identified in advance of starting the analysis. You should ask: “how this change affects the target group? how can I make this transition easier? When does the change starts and ends?”

Target: always set where you want to go, with intermediate and measurable goals. A clear guidance is one of the success keys. If you change idea and direction reacting, the risk is that too much road is traveled for little change of position.

Patience: Everybody in a change is in a hurry, and those who lead (managers or not) have goals and tasks to accomplish, and sometimes lack the necessary patience. When patience lacks, managers tend to tend to take care of problems in first person with the results of diminishing the reliability of people involved and, as a consequence, of reducing the size of the “leading group”. This brings extra effort to solve the situation and get them onboard again.

Time:  is a directly linked with patience, because time is the key to success. Changing an organization is like making a good wine. Is not enough to have grapes: you need time, patience and method to have something more than grape juice.

Leading towards goals

An anonymous, reported by Ilead365 (http://www.ilead365.com/) spends some words on co-operation and different dynamics within a team. Among this is said that “[…] When everyone is in agreement, no one has really thought it through”.

Of course, co-operating within a team is one of the key to success. But be aware: is one of the success factors.

Working with a goal (more or less shared) gives you a boost in productivity that is an enabler for success.

But this sort of close correlation between team and individuals, has the embedded risk that people tend to allign thereself to leading ideas, no longer examining ideas critically.

Under this name (better known as “groupthinking”) fall many engraving of the same “evil” (joking…lol) stone that cover
a) focusing over a shared enemy (we as a team against all others): this concept doesn’t work fully, because people tend to accept same idea without discussing it, just because is the group one
b) accepting the “alfa” idea: this doesn’t work because also leaders can make errors and some discussion can be healthy also for better and winning ideas
c) unrealism: this is obviously not working, but supported from he group, the idea can be perceived by the group as real.

As a general behaviour, I see that frequently is easier for people to follow a thought and find ways to support it than thinking a brand new idea.
But effort is quite the same.
Is one of our society problems: little makers and lot of followers that refuse any discussion.

But unleashing this potential is not so difficult: try to stimulate the discussion by gradually forcing everyone to express idea.
I do it generally having people writing down separately their contribution and summarizing it on a flip board trying to categorize them if possible.
Then discussion starts little by little.

Ending relationships (business and non)

An anonymous, reported by Ilead365 (http://www.ilead365.com/) spends some words on necessity to use lists in order to understand the need to close a relationship.

The situation is discussed for personal relations, but some of the thoughts apply also for business relationships.

The starting point is reflecting on when (and why and how) people are morelikely to end a relationship (on an average, the frequency is definitely higher after a holiday).

The suggestion is to write down a list of pros and cons to understand the real situation.

Of course is a method like others, but it has some problems because is strictly linked to  a ptoblem of these days: fast pace.

The reason for braking a relationship more frequently after a holiday is because in these moments you’re forced to take a rest from fast paced life and real thoughts emerge.

I think we cannot make a rational decision for something not rational (because leaving a business or a company or a person is not rational at full).

And jotting down pros and cons is a way to put your mind in a standby for a while to think and understand the situation.

Think and then do is the key.

Happiness and discovery

An anonymous, reported by Ilead365 (http://www.ilead365.com/) spends some words on joy of living and surprise, saying that “Life is like a page-a-day calendar: some days are more fun than others”.

In these days lived at full pace is extraordinary difficult to find (or at least getting closer) happiness, either we call it authentic or not.

In this infinite search, people tend to get around the obstacle talking of different levels of happiness (higher, lower, pleasure, deeper, temporary,…), but is just like “taking the long path”, because different levels of happiness come all from taking consciousness of everyday discovery in life.

I’m really amazed of how many people tend to confuse the pleasure given by material things with true happiness.

I’m not saying material things are bad. I like them too, and I can be honest saying that are a mean on gratification. But true and persistent gratification comes from real values, real things and the wonder of discovering new things everyday.

There is a way to smile at life in everyday things.

Maybe is not that clear, but if you look well you’ll find it.

Leadership and recognition

An anonymous, reported by Ilead365 (http://www.ilead365.com/) spends some words on skills that characterize a leader, wether is a matter of authority, power or strength.

For those being managers or those aspiring to be so, a question is the main pillar to sit on: The fact is if we are leading from a basis of power or authority, or if the leadership comes from a recognized personal strength.

Of course is not a single and unanimous answer to this dilemma. Is a matter of using the right management technique, in the right moment.

Is a matter of fact that part of the authority comes from the hierarchical position you own and that is endorsed by company internal mechanisms.

In my opinion this side of authority is better spent externally of your organization (you peers), while internally is better to lead because of being a recognized leader.

Being or becoming a leader whose power is given and confirmed by your people (over whom that power will be exercised), is generally the key for a well performing organization.

And results will soon follow. For both you and your people.

And rewards should follow the same logical path: you and your people.

Genius and curiosity

An anonymous, reported by Ilead365 (http://www.ilead365.com/) spends some words on relation between genius and curiosity, saying that “genius is perceiving every problem as something completely new”.

Is a matter of fact that curious people are more “complete” persons, at least because of the continuous (positive) stress put on their brain.
In my opinion is very difficult to trace a clear line between genius and what is perceived as genius.

For example if you try to imagine a person capable of a real effective lateral thinking, sometimes is able to catch some links that can be perceived as “genious” while they could be only the expression of a trained mind.

So, “acting and training as a genious” could make you resemble like a genious.

And curiosity, together with an open minded approach, is the key.

Open mind enables you to explore different approaches, while curiosity (cultivated with perseverance) gives you the datas to explore.

Using an IT similitude, is like having the query tools (open mind) and the database (datas extracted using curiosity).

And though, when the mind is trained to work like this is easier to make “automatic links”.

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